Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez on Friday admitted to being “deeply confused” by Colombia’s current president Alvaro Uribe and his successor, incoming President Juan Manuel Santos.
The socialist leader of Colombia’s neighbor to the east received an invitation to attend the August 7 inauguration of Santos, “which I didn’t see coming, not in a thousand years,” and almost immediately after was confronted by Uribe with accusations of harboring FARC leaders on Venezuelan soil.
“Seriously, does anyone here know how to respond to this?” Chavez reportedly asked his closest aides in the presidential Miraflores Palace in Caracas.
“I mean, I can deal with fascists, with Uribe, his baseless accusations. They are obviously part of the grand Yankee conspiracy against Cuba, and me, and Rafa and the small guy, not Bolivar,” Chavez reportedly stuttered.
“But I was about to accept that mafia guy Santos’ invitation to his inauguration to see if we can get some of our economy back in order, and now, you know, I just don’t know!” the socialist leader told his obediently quiet aides.
In an attempt to not appear indecisive, Chavez randomly sacked three of his ministers, after which he retreated for some “private consulting with my other selves.” (see photo)
Venezuela and Colombia have had strained relations over the ideological differences between its leaders, Colombian accusations that Chavez supports terrorism, and Venezuelan accusations that Colombia has become the United States’ lapdog in Latin America.