DISINFORMATION: Santos faces doping allegations

Following a surprisingly effective kick-start to his term, Colombia’s newly sworn-in President Juan Manuel Santos is accused of using performance-enhancing drugs.

With less than three days in office, Santos has already met with Ecuadorean President Rafael Correa, arranged to meet his Venezuelan counterpart Hugo Chavez on Tuesday, and mended strained relations with Colombia’s judiciary.

“What took [former president Alvaro] Uribe years to destroy, this man is now rebuilding in a matter of days. This is physically impossible without doping,” said a Colombian sports medic, who spoke to Colombia Reports on the condition of anonymity.

“It’s obvious. Santos’ eyes have doubled in size, his gestures are nervous, and he must have accomplished all this without one hour of sleep,” the medic said.

Vice President Angelino Garzon, apparently unable to keep up with the speed of his boss, was rushed to hospital on Monday and will have to undergo heart surgery.

“If Santos goes on like this, he and every member of his cabinet will be either dead in hospital within a week,” the doctor said.

Disinformation is Colombia Reports’ satire section. Photos in this section may be manipulated and information may be completely false. If you want to contribute to this section, feel free to send us your ideas.

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